My son-in-law sent this to my daughter who sent it on to me since we're all dog and cat owners. I hope you get a chuckle from it like we did.
Excerpts from a dog's diary:
- 8:00 am Dog food! My favorite thing!
- 9:30 am A car ride! My favorite thing!
- 9:40 am walk in the park! My favorite thing!
- 10:30 am Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
- 12:00 pm Lunch! My favorite thing!
- 1:00 pm Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
- 3:00 pm Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
- 5:00 pm Milk bones! My favorite thing!
- 7:00 pm Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
- 8:00 pm Wow! Watched TV with my master! My favorite thing!
- 11:00 pm Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a cat's diary:
Day 683 of my captivity:
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape... In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of.
However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. The audacity! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released -- and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. The captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe....... for now....
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While we don't own any birds I do have a fish. I doubt our cat thinks the fish is an informant however I have arranged protective custody for him so he is safe...for now...
Hope you enjoyed this little glimpse into your pets thoughts.
To Your Success,
Susan
